Sleepless among the Stars (Squee)

[Deleted]

Silence had long since settled on the ship. Although it was impossible to determine night or day in the darkness of the void. They having so recently departed from Concord Dawn still gave them some semblance of a time to sleep and wake. The others had all taken to their bunks save for Krae. The pale skinned Mandalorian slept only when it could be avoided no longer.

The Nagai sat alone in the small gathering area of the Silk Specter illuminated only slightly by the light given off by the consoles around him. Krae spent another night dwelling on loss. It seemed that death had been with him for all his life and here he found himself once more leading others into hell. Already fear for their lives gripped him.

Was he leading another group of brave soldiers to their deaths, as he had done so many times before? Would he once more return alone? It was no wonder that others didn't serve with him unless commanded. Those few mission reports that could be gone over by the average soldier were littered with death. The fact that they only rarely didn't complete the objective did little to ease his mind. What was some bit of intelligence when weighed against the lives of his fellows.

Those with children, wives and husbands. How could they be asked to join him when those at his side and in his shadow often did not return. What was worse was that no one seemed to hate him for those failures. The families of loved ones lost under his command expressed pride and were happy that their son, daughter, husband or wife had the chance to serve Mandalore and go in battle as was the dream of every Mandalorian.

Krae's face twitched at the notion. He saw very little honor when it came to dying in battle. It was a messy affair orchestrated by the insane and carried out by the frightened. Perhaps younger Mandalorians could still be conned into believing that being shot in the back on a battlefield was a warriors death but Krae and the few older Mandalorians knew better.

Victory was honor, a dead soldier did no one any good. The rest was simply grieving loved ones seeking solace in pretty words and what Krae saw as childish notions. To accept that your loved one had died for no reason was simply to hard.

Kraes mind carefully skipped over his own sorrow at the deaths of his wife and daughter. Years he had spent searching for a reason before realizing there was none. Soldiers died and that was it. A single soldier meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. Many officers commanded soldiers to their deaths and thought nothing of it. Battlions were numbers and not names to them.

Krae had only ever commanded small units. He knew everyone he'd ever served with by name and face. He had looked many mothers in the eye and told them they're son or daughter had died in the field. That they would not be returning.

These were the thoughts that kept Krae from sleep. The weight of death pressed down on his mind. Perhaps this time would be different, but he didn't dare hope. Only hardended his resolve that no one else would die this time. If he had to take a blaster bolt himself he would.

"No one else.." he whispered to himself in the dark.

[Squee]

It started with the whirring of the ship. The gentle thrum that allowed the passengers the ship was breathing properly through clear nostrils as it plowed its furrows through the eternal space. The moment the ship stopped making noises was the moment to begin worrying. The hum had once settled as part of Valry’s conscious, omnipresent throughout many days and nights. Once upon a time ago, she could close her eyes to this steady thrum, comforted by its noise and the strong arm wrapped about her waist.

The memory made her feel naked. She lay on her back, hands folded neatly over her stomach, thumbs stroking one another. Eyes were open in the blackness, studying the bleakness without much regarding thought. Only that it was there. And that there was nothing to be found in it. The humming kept her awake now. She was unused to the constant background sounds. There were no nightly bugs whispering their songs outside her window. No earthy breeze stirring her curtains in the moonlight, coughing a small burst of cool air on her skin.

Nothing but this immobile blackness and that horrible humming. Valry turned onto her side, running her hands up her arms. She’d always slept on the left side of the bed. For five years now, her turn to the left was met by absence. Well… Orak was sometimes there, especially when the thunderstorms clogged the nightly sky. He didn’t like the jagged lightning searing its electric path through the raindrops and clouds. But, sometimes she’d wake and there he was, without a thunderstorm as an excuse. And he looked like the child version of Candar.

Enough of this, she scolded herself, rolling away from the metal wall and folding her hands beneath her cheek. The darkness helped her mind play tricks on her. She thought she could feel the weight of his arm over the curve of her hip. Thought she felt the ghost of his breath at her neck, and it brought a line of goosebumps down her back.

ENOUGH! She was too tired for this! Sitting up, she swung her legs over the side of her bunk. Her toes dabbled at the cold floor first before Valry put them down, a brief shiver crawling through her body. He would have protested, she knew. He would have been woken up by her first movement and complained about her leave, even if she had needed to use the refresher. And she scowled as she passed through her door, glancing back over her shoulder at her bunk. The dim light revealed messed sheets and the indention of her body. No Candar.

Valry rolled her eyes and turned from her haunted bed to pass through the ship. A door barred her noises from their passengers on the other side, but she moved carefully and gently nonetheless. Maybe she should get a drink of water. Or maybe the walking would relieve her weary mind of its tricks. She focused on the soft scuff of her pants as her feet shuffled toward the common area. Valry dug her fingers into her temples and shifted through her hair, catching snares and tangles.

And she realized, once away from her lonely room, that she missed her son. How was he doing? He should be sleeping now. Or did Jauran let him stay up a little late? He would be grouchy in the morning if he stayed up too late. She hoped he’d gone to bed on time.

The whispered words were out of place and out of the darkness. Valry jumped, startled, her body slinking sideways and her hand brushing her… empty hip. Her legs melted into a readied stance, but by then her conscious thought had caught up with the moment. There should be nothing of threat on this ship. Only friendlies. Feeling foolish, Valry straightened her legs, squinting in the dimness to recognize the leader of this mission.

With a sigh, she carried herself out of the common room. She filled two cups of water in the tiny galley and then returned to the common area. The cup set in front of him with a tiny clack, and Valry took a seat across from him, drawing her legs up.

“Someone else,” she told him, taking a drink.

[Deleted]

It took Krae a moment to realize he had spoken aloud and another before he registered that there had been a response. His muscle went rigid at the uneasy feeling crawling up his spine. Had there been a sound following his unintentionally spoken declaration? He was sure he had heard something.

Before he had made up his mind to find out for sure she appeared, with a clink a cup of water was set before him and sitting across from him sat one of the objects of his nights turmoil. "Someone else" she said. Which Krae could only take to mean that he was also awake. For a moment he only looked at her. Krae had met her son only hours previous but the boys dark eyes had followed Krae since.

"Someone else" Krae agreed after a few seconds passed lifting the glass and gesturing to her before taking a drink. Krae gave a tired smile. Krae glanced her over. Perhaps a bit disheveled from just crawling out of bed but in Kraes mind that only enhanced her beauty. "Thanks for the water" he added It had been awhile since anyone had sat with him on purpose. Kvothe was probably the last and Krae had not seen his friend in months.

For a moment the dark thoughts were displaced by her company. So he leaned back and simply took in her presence. It was a rare treat for his mind to be free like this. It was a distraction from the norm only that kept those thoughts at bay, but it was enough and he silently thanked her.

Out loud instead of thanks he said. "Seems to be one of those nights, I try not to stay on solid ground long enough to get used to it. Always makes it harder the first night out." He was taking a shot in the dark at the reason for her wakefulness all the while trying not to be too accurate. Others prying into things you'd rather they have left alone. Krae knew how that felt all to well.

Perhaps less of a problem these days what with everyone who might have asked either being dead or far away. Silently Krae turned his thoughts away from himself. Not because he felt selfish but because dwelling on those sorrows even closer to his heart would surely drive him over the edge.

[Squee]

Valry had not expected him to speak beyond a thank you, if he had said that at all. She could not have said why she thought he wouldn’t speak, but she hadn’t. Perhaps it had to do with how he sat in here alone. Awake, even. If she hadn’t heard his whisper earlier, she would have thought him asleep. An odd choice place to sleep, but different people had their perks, and she wasn’t about to go digging into preferences.

So she sipped her water and mulled over if she should respond. If she did, how much to say? She couldn’t very well break out with “oh, my husband’s ghost is laying in my bed, waiting for me to return”. It was her first line of thought but definitely the wrong way to begin. Sighing through her nose, she rubbed her eyes with thumb and forefinger. She was too tired for any of this. At least he’d hinted at another object keeping her awake, other than

“I used to.” She replied, and a moment afterward realized that the words were vague and abstract. “To live on a ship, I mean,” she added, drinking. “I haven’t in a while, and the last time I was on a ship was to and from Shogun a few months back. You heard of Shogun, right? Most people had.” Another drink as she remembered the events. The building breach to rescue some fellows and then discovering her brother was one of the captives. She smiled faintly. It had been the first time in years that she’d seen her brother, monstrously tall as ever, but no less protective or… brotherly.

She patted her knee and ran her hand up and down her shin. With another sip of water, she leaned back into her chair, eyeballing the lights. “I used to be… all sorts of comfortable on ships. Now… not so much. May not get any sleep for another cycle.” By then, I hope my husband’s ghost will have vacated my room.

“I also…” she was speaking before she had a complete understanding of what she was saying. Might as well just finish now. “I miss… I hate having to leave my son. He’s in safe hands but I am... not there. I don’t know if you know what that’s like or not, sir, but I do know it is also contributing to my sleeplessness.” Valry kept her face turned away from him, not sure if she was embarrassed or proud at her confession. She took another sip of water to hide both.

[Deleted]

Krae sat in silence at her confession. The feeling wasn't unknown to him. Fearing for his daughter had been a full time job. A small sigh escaped his lips and before he could stop himself he said. "I miss my daughter as well." emotions swirled within him but his face remained stoic.

Shots been fired now he thought to himself. Krae's daughter had died while patrolling. It had been a light duty by any standards and even more so by that of the Bloodpacks. Often sent out to achieve some impossible goal. Krae himself had assigned her the mission. The odds of finding random combat in the vacuum of space were infinitesimal, but it had found her just the same.

Krae never discovered the identity of her attackers. All the logs on the ship had nothing to say up until she had been fired upon. It had been a sudden and overpowering attack. Krae had judged from the damage that whatever ship had attacked had been of a far greater caliber.

In short she had never stood a chance. The following investigation did very little to determine who had killed her. Krae still suspected it had been the Republic. Very few groups within the galaxy could afford to have such powerful ships.

with an effort of will Krae pulled himself from his memories and returned to the present. Everything was as it had been before. The ship still as quiet as it could be. Valry still sitting across from him. A cup of water still gripped in his pale hand.

(OOC: Shortpostishort)

[Squee]

At his silence, Valry wondered if he was measuring her hardiness by her confession. It would not be the first time she would be questioned on her willingness in the job or if her personal attachments would drive her to selfishness. Among her people, they didn’t question as often as some of her previous jobs had. By Mandalore, was she incredibly happy and relieved that she was among her kind of people again. It was better than wandering from planet to planet, accepting job after job – or being denied job after job due to Orak. Granted, none of her prior jobs had required her to advance forth into the galaxy, planets away from her son, to kill or perform tasks appointed to her. It amused her how lesser jobs, such as secretary or firearms instructor, questioned her more about her family loyalty than the Mandalorians.

Yet as Valry sat there, weighing his silence as he weighed the depth of her words, she wondered if he was going to question her readiness to the mission. She realized her sacrifice now. She recognized other, more ultimate sacrifices may sprout, and she understood that she may be asked to make those sacrifices. Valry could not promise she would not hesitate, but she was confident in her ability to accepting the sacrifice. He need not worry. She will do it. Orak would be raised within her brother’s excellent care.

Just as Valry believed she may have to speak this affirmation, Krae spoke of missing his daughter. Valry gripped her knee as she tilted her head curiously. An echoing confession? Nevermind what she was going to say! She raised her water cup and took a long drink.

“Your daughter?” Great, now she was a parrot. Valry quickly continued, “She must be grown up by now, isn’t she? Well… unless you didn’t marry young.” Stupid assumption. Makes an idiot out of me. Valry screwed her mouth, eyes moving across the floor as if searching for words. “Sorry, sir, it’s not my intention to pry or… question your life style.” By my husband’s blood! This is why I always let Candar take the role as conversationalist.

[Deleted]

Krae listended to Valry ramble and felt the pain twinge at the mention of his daughter being grown. She had been grown... had been a solider for a few years even. Again without considering his words Krae nodded slightly and said "She was grown yes..." He stopped himself there. He had only once before spoke of her to death to another and he felt he could not do so again... at least not yet.

There was enough in his words for Valry to figure it out on her own. Perhaps she wouldn't and the conversation would drift on and away from such painful topics... or maybe she would notice. Krae gripped the hilt of the sword that was laying across his lap, he was unsure if Valry had noticed it so he drew it slowly. Careful not to startle her into action.

Mandalorians could be a bit jumpy at times. Silently he laid the bare sword out on the table. Engraved in Galactic Basic upon the hilt was the word "Mercy". It was Violets sword. This along with her helmet was all Krae had recovered of her from the wreck of her ship. Deciding that letting the hint at his daughters death a chance at slipping by unnoticed would be a dishonor to her memory Krae gestured at the blade.

"This sword was hers, It has not once in its life shed blood" His eyes looked over the blade. It was a near invincible weapon. Even one of the Jedi's famed Lightsabers could not damage it. "It is one of the few things she had time to leave in this world"

[Squee]

Was grown? “Haar’chak!” Valry hissed the curse before she could stop herself. Her hand slapped against her face, the noise louder than she’d wanted. Immediately the right side of her face began to sting. This is why Candar was always the conversationalist! He wouldn’t have made such a horror of a mistake! She didn’t even know how to fix it! What was there to say? She felt like an imbecile. How did one mend this?

“Sir, I’m sorry. I would not have mentioned it if I had known. I…” Valry swallowed the rest of the apology, finding it an unnecessary babble while at the same time feeling her words were insufficient. She swallowed, flustered, embarrassed, and near mortification, though her face remained stoic, with a hard frown. The only giveaway of her inner hurricane was the rapid flicking of eyes as she refused to look at him. “I need more water.”

Valry stood quickly and marched stiffly into the next room, water cup squeezed tightly in her hand. It was only half empty, she observed as she stared down at the circularly conformed and clear liquid. She screwed her eyes shut, muttering and cursing her foolishness, her inability to speak with people. The conversations always seemed to go so gloomy around her. How did that happen? Why could they be anything good? Like building pillow forts with your kid? She capped her water cup, drank heavily, then refilled it again before she shook off her personal despair and returned to the table where Krae continued to sit.

He decided to unsheathe a sword she hadn’t seen resting with him. A small voice whispered caution and wariness, but the heel of trust crushed the sprouting doubts. He was a soldier. He was her leader. He wanted her on this mission. He wouldn’t bring her out here to kill her. Valry studied the sword from her sitting spot, then raised her eyes at Krae, who never glanced at her as he explained the weapon’s meaning. Her eyes lowered again as she drank her water.

Something to say?

“You are lucky.” She chewed softly on the edge of her cup. “I don’t even have my husband’s sword.” Going to turn the attention on yourself, aren’t you? Haar’chak. Valry was staring down at the water shifting subtly against the cup’s walls. “I sold it. I sold all of his things. Except Orak.” She finally looked up at him. “You don’t sell children, though. I had to. Sell all his things that is. It helped bring me and Orak back to Concord Dawn. I sometimes wish I’d kept something of his.” A gauntlet. His breast plate. His sword. His pistol. His helmet. His shirt. …This certainly isn’t helping me with my ghost issue. Her chest was beginning to ache profoundly, her regret taking a physical form. “But I didn’t. It’s good of you to hold something of hers. It helps keep her to memory, and she’s eternal in remembrance. Right?”

Valry had a slight flash of pride. She’d done well with her ending there, she thought. Perhaps there was a way to salvage her earlier blunder.

[Deleted]

Gray eyes flicked to the woman across from him as she cursed and then returned to the blade before him. It was a response to be expected from someone who had children, but not one Krae had ever received. Once more she began to ramble. He sighed lightly as she escaped under the pretense of needing more water, not entirely sure that she would return at all. More then once had Krae driven people off by dredging up those things that hurt him most.

She returned however and Krae sat silently as she attempted to recover from what he guessed she saw as her earlier blunder and then she mentioned her husband. Kraes eyes turned and focused on her as she spoke. By the end he was sure she knew hurt as well as he did. Mentally he sighed. You're terrible at making conversation. It doesn't have to be about all the bad things you know. He berated himself.

Krae sat in silence for a few moments in silence after she finished speaking. Then he stood and slowly sheathed his daughters swords. He turned to face Valry. His pale face absent of all emotions and his posture relaxed. A guise he wore so often he slipped into it without a thought. The silence stretched as he looked at her. He had never been great with this sort of thing. Walling himself off from others and keeping to himself was always easier.

Then his eyes found hers and he spoke. "This is not something I've discussed with many people. I'm not sure how we even got to this point. I'm not an open person... but you..." Krae shook his head slightly as the mask of stoicism cracked a little. The silence stretched out a bit longer before he felt it safe to continue speaking. "You know the ghosts that can haunt a person.... in here" Krae said tapping his temple with his index finger "and here" His hand drifted down over his heart where he made it into a fist.

A small smile began to form around the edges of his lips. "My name is Krae, you do not have to call me Sir" Even for his lack of social tact the switch seemed abrupt but he didn't really care. On a soldier the gesture would not be lost. He was casually tossing aside a hard won rank to put them on equal footing. The chain of command had no place here. For some reason he didn't want to be just a soldier to her, didn't want to be her commanding officer.

[Squee]

The moments of silence stretched beyond Valry’s conception of a few moments. Horrible, long minutes and Valry spent the majority of it frowning into her water cup. Maybe she shouldn’t have felt so proud of her recovery. Maybe it wasn’t a recovery at all. It just sunk her deeper into a hole, too deep for a hand to plunge forward and yank her back to the surface. Maybe he felt worsened by her words, not experiencing the bloom of grateful understanding like she had been expecting.

Maybe she should just shut her mouth, return to her quarters, and wallow in her selfish stupidity. Mingle with her ghosts. Linger in some sort of sanity created from painful loneliness and destructive yearning.

Her legs unfolded slowly. Her feet pressed to the floor and Valry’s muscles flexed as she considered enacting on those thoughts. She raised her eyes to speak to him directly, and found his face turned to her. Dark shadows pocketed where his eyes should be, but those pockets were looking at her. Valry froze, heart startled, as her mind translated it into a grotesque image. As she blinked, the ugliness of the image fizzled away and she forced her hand to relax around her cup.

He told her how odd this conversation was to him and one corner of her lip curled some. “I’m often asked where Orak’s father is.” The strangeness of this conversation was lost on her. Too often she’d spoken of Cander. Besides the slight pang of loss, Valry handled the confession with good nerve. Yet when Svar mentioned haunting ghosts, her throat constricted. He understood. The muscles under her jaw began to burn as she insisted on suppressing the sad emotion that filled her. No. No tears. She could not show how much it choked her.

But your husband is gone! A part of her screeched she had every right. That she was still allowed to cry for his passing. She was allowed because she was the woman who loved him more than anyone else. She had trusted him. She had been at his side. She had covered his back. She had birthed his son.

Her hand clenched on the table. Her gaze fell back inside her water cup. Her chest tightened, feeling like it was squeezing shut, as she bit on her tongue and willed no tears. Valry was afraid if she let herself intake a breath, she would lose her composure. She rolled her shoulders back as she sucked in a small amount of air, cooling the burning in her throat, attempting at relaxation. Her eyes stung and she felt them water, but she swallowed thickly and blinked several times. No, no tears tonight. Please no tears tonight.

”My name is Krae…”

It was like cold water splashing across her face. Instantly, her mind, desperate for another topic, diverted attention to this new subject and latched onto it, depending on the change to save her from drowning in unwanted sorrow. She looked up. Why? Why’d he want her to call him Krae? He should just remain as ‘sir’. Valry swallowed again, struggling to keep her mind away from what he’d said before lest she have to fight her emotion again.

“All… right,” she agreed, awkwardly. “But only if you refer to me as Valry. Not… Justic.” She barred her mind from thoughts of Cander. “However, I might… On the field I might keep to rank.” She sloshed to water in her cup. “Just because… well, it is… only appropriate.” She reached up and tugged at her earlobe, screwing her lips to once side. “I don’t… want comments about, uh, personal stuff. Could be filthy gossip. So… for… off the record stuff? Like now?”

[Deleted]

Kraes eyebrow arched only slightly at her stumbling through an agreement. "Alright Valry, for off the record stuff" he agreed. Suppose its only proper to keep to ranks in the field. He thought to himself. Then a silence crept in, Krae felt it and for the first time in many years he scrambled for something to say. Attempting to keep the conversation going. Finally he hit upon a subject that he thought might keep each of them from straying into the darker places of their hearts.

"So Valry, what do you specialize in?" It seemed a natural question to Krae. he knew that not every soldier had a specialty, but for the most part he ones who worked with him did. Along with being a safe topic this was also something Krae needed to know as his skills were primarily figuring out how to best apply the skills of others.

His had been a long career and a good chunk of it had been spent as a commander of others. He wasn't sure he had earned that spot or was right for it. Surly other commanders did not lead their mean to death in every mission.

Belatedly Krae realized where his thoughts were headed and shoved them aside. Got to stop this he berated himself. It had just become to easy to travel down those paths in his mind, now familiar and well worn. Then maybe its time you cut yourself a new trail... he glanced over Valrys face. Maybe because he had worn his mask so long and knew it so well he thought that he could see it on others or maybe he was delusional.

He thought he could see a glimmer of hurt behind the brown of her eyes, could she see the same in his? The thought made him avert his gaze slightly. Not that she didn't know already. Mentally he sighed and wonder at the direction this night had taken. Perhaps there was a reason for this break in his routine. Only time would tell.

[Squee]

“Why, killing people of course.” The question had helped Valry adopt a somewhat crooked smile. “Helping people to their timely graves for their times have come. Or rather the timely ground. I do not bury them. I’m surprised you had to ask.” Her new smile slid around her water cup’s edge as she drank.

“But, I’m sure that is not what you meant. I can kill people from a close distance, a far distance, a very far distance, or from far, far away. Take your pick. I primarily handle pistols and sniper rifle. Blaster bolt material. Not the slugs. Daddy taught me how to use slugs, but the bolt first, and we both preferred the flash of red or yellow light. Also makes for cleaner kills. Less brains to worry about cleaning off the armor plates later.” This she could talk about. Of course, she could all deliver this in one single, practiced speech.

“My sniper rifle is slightly out of practice. Hunting with it was interesting enough. Wish I had more time to practice the far, far away option of my list. Though I’ll still be able to kill someone at a very far distance well enough for you, if you have need of that.” An inkling feeling told Valry she should not have said that, but she figured she should be honest. “I’ve put my pistols to better use, recently. Base raiding doesn’t allow much long distance killing to occur. My mother taught me a defensive close combat that I apply with my pistol training.

“Needless to say, Krae,” using his name felt strange, and she swept away her awkward notion with a quick sip. “You tell me to kill it and it will die, one way or another. You are the arm, and I am the gun.” She paused momentarily, running over her list of abilities besides her weapons. “I… also know a few hacking techniques across all fields. Vehicles, droids, terminals, even elevators. I wouldn’t suggest how and where I learned that gift though. And I can be persuasive. Probably… hard to believe that last one.”

Smiling came easily this time. “Now, do you just carry around your daughter’s sword for the memory of it or do you know how to use it yourself?”

[Deleted]

"Both" Krae answered her question simply. If he were a younger man he would have indulged himself in doing something stupid and flashy to answer her question, but now he would frown at someone who though to display their skill in such a way. "I prefer close range fighting... really close" Past encounters flitted through his mind. The clang of steel on steel rang through his memories. He had seen countless fights of that sort and still the sheer test of skill sent a thrill through him.

It seemed that, only when he was inches from an enemy doing everything in their power to kill him, did he feel alive anymore. No one who had engaged him with intent to kill had walked away, Krae still stood. Bruised and battered maybe but always the victor. Small victories though they turned out to be. It was the fights he wasn't there for that always seemed to matter.

"All of my fights are this close" he said as he stepped within' inches of Valry. Perhaps this was what his flashy and stupid had turned into. Complete disregard for personal space his wifes voice called to him from the back of his mind. Something she had said once when they first met. A small grin played around the edges of his mouth. "All of them... and here I stand."

The last words rolled out in a deep voice, his tone layered with conviction. "I can use pistols if I must but I prefer a blade" He said his voice becoming more casual although he still didn't move out of her space. What are you doing? He asked himself Testing her nerve or do you just want to- He silenced the thought before it could fully form.

I just want to see what she does. He told himself and it was true he was interested in her response even if that wasn't the only reason he had moved so close. His steel gray eyes were fixed on her, watching... waiting to see what would come next.

[Squee]

A soft “Ha” parted from Valry when he began. Of course he would keep it for memory, they had already covered that. She simply wanted to know if he could really wield it, and wield it competently enough so he didn’t cut off his fingers. Like her mother had been (or is), or her twin brother Jauran, or… Candar. Krae eventually answered what she wanted to know. It would seem half the people in her life preferred the blade, she’d found. It was quite the popular weapon. But then, she supposed, so were blasters. She nodded, accepting his preference, but she’d realized her water cup was low and her tongue still felt like a ragged stone against the roof of her mouth.

Valry stood then, scooting her cup across the table’s surface, and dropped her mouth to announce her brief departure. She wasn’t allowed to manage the interruption, because Krae stepped close. There was a flash of recognition as she realized he was too close. Her body moved with muscle memory, her hand folding into a fist and her forearm coming out to bar him from becoming closer. Her arm lightly pushed back against his chest but she didn’t shuffle her feet away from him.

No. With her chin tucked slightly, her eyes were focused on the line where her arm contacted his chest. Here was her line of trust. She trusted him as her leader and as another soldier. In fact it had been that trust and understanding that she hadn’t reacted in a more violent way. But he would come no closer to her. Yet, as much discomfort as his closeness brought her, she would not budge. She owned this space and it would be respected.

“Yes, I can see how uneasy you can make other people. I’m sure it comes in handy.” Her eyes lifted up to meet his. She pushed a little harder with her forearm, her proof to him that she refused to be moved. But his closeness was beginning to make her paranoid. The last man this close her, family notwithstanding, had been an enemy, a dead man. Why did he come so close? Was there something he was trying to gain? She did not need a show of authority or power, and she definitely wouldn’t allow him to shove her around.

“Please…” but it was not asking. She demanded gently, “Back off.”

[Deleted]

The urge to knock her hands away from him surged and was suppressed. your own damn fault he thought to himself. He was the one who had knowingly entered into her personal space. A violent reaction from him would not make the situation any better.

As the last syllable her demand for him to move away rolled off her tongue Krae obliged her. With a smooth motion he retreated from her. His hands raised, palms outward and open indicating he had no ill intent. "I'm sorry, was just a demonstration" he said firmly "I did not mean to offend"

It was true enough, he hadn't intended to upset her although he couldn't lie to himself and say that he'd thought such an outcome impossible. Silently he found himself wondering at his action. You're terrible with people you know? He berated himself. Spending your life killing them doesn't make for good social skills
He answered back.

It wouldn't be the first time in recent years that he'd scared someone off. Assuming she was scared off. Krae still wasn't sure how she'd take it. She'd readily stood her ground when he'd stepped close. Krae was sure that if he'd stayed that close any longer the two of them would be having it out.

Still, it bespoke of a sturdiness in her character. He doubted an odd action a few awkward moments would scare this woman. He stood silently watching her, waiting to see what her response would be. What she would do. Never going to stop testing people are you? He thought at himself. Probably not. He answered back.

[Squee]

Her free hand slid quickly over her fist and forearm, as if to wipe away where she had touched him. That arm twisted and stretched downward before her, her hand stroking the surface in its retreat. After such a strong stance against him, she now seemed to recoil and shrink. Her arms tucked close to her and her eyes averted momentarily as she toiled over which words to say.

“I… do not have good experiences with strange people invading past my arm length.” That could have come out better, but it could have been much worse too. The way she’d said it almost resembled a warning, her voice forceful. Perhaps she should have been nicer, but she also believed he needed to know exactly what she’d thought of his demonstration. Invasion. Hostile. Undesired.

Now that he’d stepped back there was a crawling relief spreading through her. The tension of her body diminished a small degree. Those senses that had become hyperaware of him tingled slightly, but her eyes still flickered across him and the space around him suspiciously.

Then Valry felt the urge to hit him. Stupid man. If he’d meant her no harm or offense, why would he grow close to her? What was he gaining? And he simply stood there watching her! What did he want? Well say something, dammit! She could feel her gaze heat into a glare. Striking her fist into her pocket, she plucked up her water cup and once again left the room, feet making little slaps on the floor to announce her departure.

Stupid man. At least he apologized. She upturned the water cup and what was left of the water splattered messily in the metal sink. With a soft snort passed through her nose. She left the water cup upturned in the sink. For some unknown number of times tonight, Valry returned to the sitting area where Krae. She stopped and crossed her arms, her courage and anger stirred together perfectly. There was only one way to receive information, and that was through asking. If he decided to play hardball with her, she was going to be even less than enthusiastic.

“What are you expecting from me to you.” Again, she did not ask.