Tea Time at the Temple (Looma, Open)

[sparrow]

It was a small room, nestled deep within the Sith Temple on Korriban. Near the cafeteria area, it had some basic kitchen facilities and a number of number of plain-looking knee-high tables distributed evenly over the stone-tiled floor.

Zarene Yin stood in front of the sink, washing the blood from her hands. She had handed her catching of shyracks from her short hunting expedition earlier over to one of the cafeteria workers to be made into catfood, but not before she had skinned her kills herself first.

The kettle of water on the stove just reached a boil. Zarene did not turn around to look at it as the stove switched off, and the kettle levitated upwards, floating over to the teapot that was on the nearby counter, a column of steam rising into the air as it poured its contents.

Now to let it steep for a few minutes, Zarene thought, as she dried her hands. The teapot floated over to her hand, and she placed it on the table as she knelt down.

"So...," she looked the other person in the room, a yellow-skinned teenage twi'lek, as she shifted her body to a sitting position, rest her metal elbow on one knee. "I've been told you're finally free of that Dominion. Very good."

[Mara]

(((Sorry for the length... hopefully subsequent ones won't be so long, once we get into things...)))


[…from Calm Before the Storm]

Just because she had agreed to meet up with Zarene again didn’t mean Looma was in a hurry to do so. Especially since she had been soaked to the bone and her sodden clothing had hung on her like dead weight. If the woman could wait until coming inside from the rain to speak to her, she could certainly wait a few more minutes to let the Twi’lek replace her attire and gain some sense of comfort first. It wasn’t as if Looma had anywhere else to go, and even if she did, Zarene could easily find her again. No, she had already tossed out the idea of ignoring the woman’s request and had steeled herself to whatever the older Sith had to say. Looma was prepared to listen to it, whatever it turned out to be.

And so after she had finally made it inside the confines of the Temple, she had headed straight for her quarters. It was a fairly simple room, just like all the initiate-level Sith had. Hers was emptier than most, containing just the bare essentials. Looma hadn’t very many possessions she could call solely her own, and those she did have were carried on her body. The small chest in the corner contained only a couple spare sets of clothing. She removed one of these and laid the robes, tunic, and trousers on her small cot of a bed and stripped off her weapons and all her wet clothing. Perhaps later she would look for a brazier to pull into her room and dry them off, but for now she just tossed the soggy pile onto the floor. After scrubbing her yellow body dry with an old blanket, she quickly redressed herself, clipping the three lightsabers back to her belt but leaving the bag of shards hidden in her room.

Feeling much better, at least in her appearance—her emotional state was still rather unstable but in check—Looma had left the private areas of the Temple and went searching for the room where Zarene would be waiting for her. She had taken only one wrong corner before making it to the proper location. Confusion teased her features briefly as she scanned the room before entering. For some reason Looma had thought they would speak in Zarene’s own quarters, or at least somewhere a bit more private. This room, though, was strangely furnished, only containing a small kitchenette and some small tables, but it appeared empty for the moment of any other Sith. Zarene apparently thought it would serve her purpose well enough.

Deciding she couldn’t delay any longer, Looma shrugged off her feelings and, using the Force, forced calm upon herself as she passed through the doorway, the hem of her dark robe swirling around her booted feet. Unsure whether to sit or stand, she remained on her feet, stopping midway into the room. Her violet eyes watched Zarene quietly as the woman puttered around at the small kitchen area, assumably preparing the aforementioned tea. Obviously the Sith felt in no rush to speak to Looma, and that was fine with the Twi’lek. Everything would come in due time; once she had resigned herself to this meeting, she hadn’t let her thoughts wander too far, keeping them snugly in the present. It wouldn’t do to try to analyze the situation; she was ready to take the blows as they came.

Apparently finished, Zarene moved to one of the tables and sat down on the floor in front of it. Not wanting to tower over the other Sith and be disrespectful, Looma stepped closer and folded her legs beneath her as well, pulling away the cowl of her hood to reveal her yellow head and lekku. Normally she wouldn’t have cared about such a gesture, but she also didn’t want to make this conversation go any worse for her. She had had enough of defiance for the day and hadn’t much energy to fight any longer. Looma just wanted to get this over with, let Zarene say her piece, and be on her way. There were many other things she could be doing, like moping in her room, avoiding food, or stalking the halls of the Temple in a clouded depression.

The other Sith’s words snapped her mind back outward. Zarene had skipped any sense of preamble or pleasantries, coming right to the matter she apparently wanted to speak to Looma about. Any anger she may have felt at the mention of the Dominion, anything related to her master and his departure, was initially trumped by a wave of astonishment. Of all the possibilities that had flitted through her head earlier, this was one topic that the Twi’lek had never considered. Why would Zarene even care that the Dominion no longer held her in its grasp?

But then Looma’s widened and surprised eyes narrowed into hard amethysts as she stared back at the other Sith. She would hardly call the loss of her master and the dissolution of his Dominion a ‘good’ thing. Anger began weaving itself into her Force aura. It wasn’t the sharp, volatile emotion that had caused her fight with Var earlier, but it was a slow, throbbing feeling permeating her body. Looma had half a mind to stand up, toss a biting remark at Zarene, and leave this impromptu meeting, but she knew that that would hardly solve anything, only prolong the inevitable.

Her voice was hard and laced with sarcasm as she finally replied. “Good? Good, that my life is essentially over? That my sense of identity is gone, my master is gone? I’m back to where I started, before coming to this blasted planet.” It was a small dagger aimed at the woman who had brought her away from Bakura to Korriban. "Except back there, I had…” Looma trailed off, her voice cracking, and turned her gaze away from Zarene, unwilling to voice Caleb’s name. She hadn’t seen him in months and was sure that he was still around, she wouldn’t have fallen into this self-deprecating depression after losing her master.

Looma turned her face back to look at Zarene, unwittingly changing tactics, and her eyes had lost some of their hardness. “Except now I think I’m even worse off than I ever was on Bakura.” She looked away again, the memories of the agriworld coming back to her, joining the wistful, sad look that covered her anger. “It was a hard life… but there was a simplicity about it that made it bearable. Sometimes I miss it.” Her eyes drifted down to her lap, and her yellow fingers played with the fabric of her robe. It was more than she had wanted to say, but the words had just come out, thoughts that she hadn’t realized she still harbored. They had been squashed by the hope of coming to Korriban and gaining a master, but now… now they were slowly creeping back.

[sparrow]

Zarene listened silently as Looma ranted. When Looma finally finished, Zarene calmly poured herself a cup of tea, holding the cup close to her mouth as she breathed in the rising steam before taking a sip. After a long pause, she finally spoke. "Well, aren't you melodramatic?" Her voice was soft, her tone flat. "So you'd rather be stuck going towards a dead end, because it's simple. You can try to stick your head in the sand, but the galaxy isn't simple, and as long as we're at war, it won't get simpler."

She paused, and took another sip. "The Republic is vast, it's soldiers numerous. If we are to break them, we must be committed. A steel fist. Solid. Strong. But there are those in our ranks who would siphon resources away from the Order to advance their own ends. Parasites, weakening us and diverting our strength. We are better off without their kind. It was unfortunate that you found yourself involved with them. But unlike those others, you probably didn't know what you were getting into, so you get the chance to start clean."

"However, if you'd rather return to Bakura, I suppose I can arrange that. The facility still stands, after all. But know this. The first time we went to Bakura, it was but a simple recon and recruitment mission. But it remains an important Republic world, so we will be returning. And next time, it will be with the fleet. The facility will be but a pile of blackened rubble when we are done."

[Mara]

(((Sorry for the delay… my motivation disappeared for a bit, but hopefully now I can get out a semi-decent post that makes sense, haha. ;p)))


Still surprised at how the conversation had turned, at least on her side, Looma was unwilling to look back at Zarene. The yellow Twi’lek was already inwardly chiding herself; she didn’t need the other Sith getting after her for being sentimental as well. She wanted to take it all back, pretend it had never happened, but at the same time, knew that she couldn’t. It was out there, and deep down, it was all true as well. There was a small part of her that did miss the simplicity of Bakura. Not that she didn’t feel honored to have joined with the Sith here on Korriban, but she had good memories of her time on the agriworld. The one time she had felt truly happy since before her sister had been taken away. And now…

She pushed away the thoughts and swallowed hard, forcing herself to think of the present. The present where her life felt essentially over, and happiness was a distant and unattainable thing. Zarene replied to her then, aiding in her task of remaining in the here and now. The Sith’s words hurt, almost reiterating what she gone through in her head, but she took them, silently. Looma continued to stare down at her hands as they picked at the hem of her cloak. All she could do in answer was shrug, though she felt that she did agree. Running from her problems wouldn’t solve anything, but at the same time, she didn’t know how she could do anything else. A simple life held a certain mystique, and her current circumstances seemed to have her headed towards a dark emptiness.

Looma took Zarene’s veiled words of derision against the former Dominion in stride. After her first remark, the Twi’lek had almost expected the Sith to not be finished with the matter. Now she was starting to understand why she had said what she had, that she was better off. She didn’t have to agree with the woman—probably never would—but she could see the matter from her side. From the outside looking in, one could make the case for what Zarene was speaking of. It did seem as if Shard and his Dominion had split off from the main Brotherhood of Sith. But she had been so thrilled at the idea of becoming a student and being apart of such a grand plan that she had been blind to the overall image. Doubts started creeping into her Force aura as she wondered if she had made a mistake, brought this all on herself.

However, Looma knew she would be far from healed or an ability to come to terms with her current situation completely. She would always carry the scar her master had left upon her heart. His abandonment of her, twice over, would never be forgotten. It would always meld with her past circumstances of being abandoned, first by her parents, then by the Jedi. And even when she thought she had finally found a home with the Sith on Korriban, had found a master, that had broken away as well. The only one left was Caleb, and she knew that even that relationship was now strained. He had been so busy with his own training and missions that she had barely seen him in the past few months. Just a few small threads were holding her together.

At the other Sith’s mention of Bakura, she finally looked up, facing Zarene. Her anger had abated, but the shadowy depression was still thick around her. After all, her disappointment was a root of her rage against Shard, against everyone. She shook her head, after briefly considering removal back to Bakura. But Zarene was right; it would serve no purpose for her to return to the fields and live out her short life in the hot sun. There would be no one like Caleb to help her get through the days. The best thing for her would be to move on, hope for a new master, if she could ever bring herself to attach to another teacher, and hope to keep from going completely insane in the meantime. “No,” she added with the physical gesture. “No, Korriban is where I belong now. For better… or for worse.”

[sparrow]

"Good, good." Perhaps she had spent too much time trying to deal with thickheaded initiates, that it was a rather pleasant surprise when Looma did not attempt to contradict everything that she said. If you cannot command, then you must obey. That had been one of the first lessons taught to her when she began her service with the Exchange those years ago. Renata had repeated a very similar sentiment to her. Sometimes, it seemed like everyone in the Sith Order, from the lowest initiate on up, believed that they should command without proving themselves first.

"Tell you what, I'll send out some feelers, and see if there are any masters out there willing to train an apprentice. No guarantees though. So... tea?"

[Mara]

(((I apologize for the wait. I had hoped to get to this much sooner, but you know how life is…
I hope this doesn’t suck too much.)))


Looma was a bit surprised at Zarene’s apparent closing of the matter. It took her a good deal of self-control for her to not let her emotion show outwardly on her face or inwardly through the Force. Though managing to keep her jaw from going slack, her violet eyes had briefly widened before then returned back to normal. After the initial spike in her Force aura, she gained back her original stoic, slightly depressed guise. If the Twi’lek had known that the other Sith had needed only such a simple answer from her, she would have given it much sooner, avoided prolonging this conversation.

A conversation that was taking some odd turns. At first, Looma had thought the other Sith had asked her in to berate her for her conflict with the other Twi’lek Var, perhaps even for all her other confrontations in the Temple prior to that. But she had been wrong; Zarene had wanted to speak of her ill-fated alliance with the Dominion and with Shard. Though she hadn’t been expecting it and would prefer not to dwell openly on it, she could understand it, and she had been prepared for an extended discussion. Again, though, it was a briefly lived subject. Looma was beginning to think that the Echani was a woman of few words and gestures, getting what she needed and moving on. A small part of her mind tucked away the information for later.

Zarene’s next words caught her more off guard, and the yellow Twi’lek was unable to recover quite as quickly. Her surprised blossomed into her Force presence, and her eyes blinked rapidly for a few seconds. Looma’s fingers stopped fiddling with the edge of her cloak as she stared at the other Sith. She had completely expected to receive some punishment from Zarene or even a long, harsh lecture. But now, after a brief talk that must have just been the woman feeling her out, she was actually offering to help her get back on her feet. Looma couldn’t help wondering what was going on, if this was actually some sort of mean-spirited prank against her, a thinly veiled slap on the wrist.

She ran through the possibilities in her mind, but in the end, just decided to take them at face value. So far, Zarene had seemed completely honest with her, sometimes brutally so, but still, she felt no lie in Sith’s words. Besides, there would be no harm, even if it turned out to be a false promise. A part of Looma really didn’t expect she’d find a new master any time in the relative future. And if the elder Sith did find a candidate, it would be up to the Twi’lek to accept or not. So really, it was win-win, in her mind.

Sucking in a deep breath and bringing herself under control, she nodded again. “Er, that’s very… nice of you.” Her headtails swung slightly as she shook her head to the offer of tea. “Thanks, but I think I’ll pass. I should get back to… to my room, my training, if that’s all right.” All Looma really wanted to do was leave, thinking that Zarene was now done with her, and wasn’t really concentrating on creating a good enough excuse. With a bit of a wince as her stiff muscles unfolded, she slowly stood up. She was about to turn and go, when she stopped. Something was still bothering her about this whole meeting. “Is that the only reason you called me in here? To check my psychological status and offer your help?” They hadn’t been meant so, but she realized after she said them that her words may have come out a bit rude, especially after the Sith’s last words.

[sparrow]

"No. Nothing more." She drained the rest of the cup before setting it down on the table. "Training, yes. Spend more time doing that and less wallowing in some kind of stupid self-pity. You'll just end up like that other twi'lek, and one whiny twi'lek in the temple is annoying enough already."

[Mara]

(((Well, I think I’ll just end this, since there doesn’t seem to be anything else to do here anymore…)))


She smiled tightly at Zarene as her questing curiosity for more information was quickly shut down and focused elsewhere, into the other Sith’s opinion of what the young Twi’lek should be spending her time doing. Since the matter of the former Dominion had been settled, along with the Echani’s offer of finding her a new master, there was nothing else left for Looma to spend her time but more learning and practicing. Otherwise, the older Sith had added with thinly veiled contempt, she would just end up following the same path that Var had. A path that Looma felt she was already on and unsure of how to get off of, or even if she was ready to do so, or wanted to.

But she wasn’t about to admit any of that out loud. After all, the older Sith had offered to help her, giving her advice in how to move forward in the process. Punishment for previous actions had never been mentioned. Looma didn’t want to appear ungrateful for getting off relatively easy. Still, it took all of her self-control and energy to keep from biting out a reply and to instead nod friendly enough at Zarene before she continued to the door and out of the room. She didn’t completely understand why, but the way the Echani Sith’s words had landed on her ear cones had bothered her.

Walking through the halls and alleys of the Temple, Looma wasn’t sure where she was going, physically and otherwise. Definitely not to her quarters or to any of the training rooms. She just needed to walk and to think. Her future was still cloudy. Zarene had pointed out a new path for her, to accept a new master and move on, forget that the last year had happened. But the yellow Twi’lek wasn’t sure it would be so easy. The damage and hurt couldn’t simply be wished away or covered up. Perhaps if she were years older and hardened to the realities of life she’d be able to recover without much more than a second glance. However, she was still young, impressionable, and prone to let her emotions rule her.

Looma sighed, finally turning a corner that would eventually lead back to the living area of the Temple and to her personal room. Passing by all these other Sith, seeing them intent on their own conversations and errands, on her meditative stroll had only increased her alienated feeling. Her depression and anger at her current lot in life. She didn’t feel like she belonged, though deep down she knew she could be nowhere else. As she had told Zarene, this was her home now, for better or for worse. Only because she had nowhere else to call home, no other options. Where else could a young Twi’lek with her raw Force talent go?

The one constant in her life, the one thing that had never changed or wavered, was Caleb and her feelings for him. But it had been so long since she had seen him, spoken to him, or even had any contact with the young man. Though she thought of him often in her darkest moments, visions of him the only thing keeping a small bit of hope alive inside of her, Looma was afraid that even that connection would soon fade away. If it hadn’t already without her realizing it, stuck as she was in her misery and self-loathing.

Closing the door behind her, she slid down to the floor, her back to the wall, careful to keep her sensitive lekku out of the way. Looma no longer bothered with keeping her presence in the Force contained. She poured all her agony into it, not caring who nearby might feel it. Tears welled up in her violent eyes, and she sobbed silently. There was a hole deep inside of her, a hole formed by Shard and all the other disappointments of her childhood. A hole that may never close, no matter what Zarene or any other Sith told her. A hole that perhaps Caleb wouldn’t even be able to mend, after a time.


[to Strength of the Dark Side…]