The Telling Truth (Open)

[RaeLynn]

People tended to lie. It was a simple fact that often wove itself into the most delicate and simple of situations that turned it from such into the messy web that tangled up its victims and strangled them with its hatefulness until the real evil could come around. Betrayal. It loomed around corners that had not yet been discovered by the blind eye and waited for them to be caught by lies until it could attack the defenseless and distraught person itself. Fact was fact, and this was one of the basic truths of the universe. One could say that everyone turned a blind eye to it despite its impact on the world around it. Something simple getting away with so much was hardly understandable.

RaeLynn had learned this at an early age as she had lived on Felucia, listening to the lies of the tribes that couldn't even settle disputes over who had killed a piece of grass without the help of herself or her former master. It had been hard, of course, listening to it day in and day out as the world she knew grew more and more twisted by the hours.

By the lies.

The lies, they never cared. They didn't have feelings. Their intent was to hurt everybody, including the person who had spread them like a disease. Lies backfired by nature, harming everyone intended before turning on its speaker like a dog with rabbies on its master. Once again, they created webs. The lies got easier to tell, but harder to remember. Small details like the color of a speeder or even larger details like what planet everything had occured on became befuddled and utterly damaging. Everything would fall apart.

The telling of truth, in RaeLynn's eyes, was the most powerful weapon of all. It was always the most damaging for it had the proof to back it up, whether it be know or not. Someone always had the last say with the truth. More powerful than the very grips of the Force, it could sway the highest mountains by stating the simple fact of 'You will fall' in its ears. Everything came down to the truth and the lie. The problem is, what if you can't tell the difference?

Sitting out in the gardens of the Temple, RaeLynn pondered this to herself. She, along with many great thinkers of the world, could not grasp the answer that lay beyond the barrier of the mind. It would continue to stump the minds of the wise for the years to come until the end. Then, all would be clear. Until then, RaeLynn was stuck arguing with herself. Her legs crossed beneath her as she thought over about the end and true clarity, one simple thought hit her like a ton of bricks. The end may be closer than originally thought. A small amount of laughter could be heard from the gardens a moment later.

[Jace]

(Note for myself here: The occurrences in this thread take place before Ilum)

Jace walked out of the training chambers, perspiration on his brow. He had just finished his daily lightsaber training regime and was making his way towards the gardens. He usually went for a quiet stroll after his saber training, it helped him reflect on his forms. Training was one thing, but if you didn't reflect on what you had just done, then half your training is lost right there.

He entered the garden and saw the usual Jedi milling about, discussing various things. As he walked by, many Jedi bowed or gave him a quick "Hello Master". Jace responded in kind, he had trained many of these Jedi, and it was always nice to see them again. He continued his walk through gardens until he noticed a, what he assumed to be a young knight. Open closer inspection he realized she was one of the recently knighted.

"You look troubled RaeLynn. What is on your mind?" he asked as he walked up to her with a reassuring smile.

Jace had also come across many Jedi with something on their mind. For ten years of his life, the ability to read other people had kept him alive. It was an ability he had never lost, but one didn't need ten years of experience to see there was something on this girls mind.

[RaeLynn]

RaeLynn looked up quickly, her hand immediately at the hilt of one of her sabers before she realized who it was. When she went into herself so deeply to meditate about the problems of the world and not her setting, she often found herself to lose contact with the world around her. The Force did not spike as she felt a person come nearer or use around her, but she found herself startled and nearly ready to whip out her sabers. It was more then once that this had occured to padawans asking advice and coming from behind her. They had almost all learned never to startle her less they want to be close to death.

Letting out a nervous laugh, RaeLynn nodded her head toward him. "Master Jace," she breathed, shaking her head a little and letting her hand fall. A small smile came to her face. "Sorry. I'm not one for being startled."

She paused for a moment, looking around her, before lowering her head to look at her hands. "I just wonder sometimes... Lies, betrayal, envy... They're so trifling and well known, yet they still affect us in possibly the largest way. It's just... so petty. We should be able to get past this, shouldn't we?"

Looking up, RaeLynn couldn't help the sigh that escaped her. "I know it's unlikely, but I wish it would all just stop," she muttered, holding her head in her hands.

[Jace]

Jace saw her hand flash to her lightsaber, his hand flashed to his own. He didn't think she would actually strike but caution was second nature to him.

He furrowed his brows just a little bit as she put her head in her hands. Jace was not all that unused to seeing Jedi go through such conflict especially at this age. Though it still worried him a little that she was having such thoughts.

"Well you must understand Rae, that such things as lies in deceit are so common because of their nature. They are the easy way out, and it is a natural instinct for a being to take the easy way out. Such deception is as you well know a path to the dark side.

That is why as Jedi we must endeavor to show the rest, that rejection of these leads to good. That is what you and I and every member of the Order attempts to achieve everyday with our work. We work on rejecting the dark and embracing the light. We show them and ourselves that in the end, the easy way is never the best way."

He stopped there, for he waited to see her reaction. It was always important to get feedback, so you could better understand the persons train of thought.

[RaeLynn]

RaeLynn nodded her head a little as she smoothed her hair back and out of her eyes for a moment, her other hand dropping by her side. Blinking her eyes a moment, she got up and smiled a little. It was a bit forced, but some of it was genuine.

"I know what we must do," she said, a small sigh escaping her. Her eyes were clouded with thoughts that stayed deep inside her, her mind far more progressive then her mouth would allow. She had always been somewhat of a recluse, not speaking her full mind and sometimes avoiding contact with others for days if she could help it. In her mind, her thoughts rushed far too fast for even herself to comprehend on the problems surrounding them. Sometimes she hoped that her mind would stop blabbering and allow her to get some actual work done.

"I know," she muttered again, her head bobbing. "We have to be the light for no one else seems to be stepping into the role of a guide. I just..." RaeLynn paused, shaking her head to herself. Everything made perfect sense in her head, but seemed like a foreign language when spoken. She continued on anyway. "I just wonder, what if no one does listen? What if they continue on their path to the dark side despite the warning signs and people shouting 'No, don't go there!' What is to become of the people that we try to protect that only rebel against us in the end?"

A slight growl escaped her as she turned away, her mind rushing past her once more. "No one group is respected by the whole galaxy. We are included in that and there are many who hate us. What are we to do for them? Abandonment isn't an option, but how are we to help them?"

Groaning a bit to herself, she shook her head once more. It was almost as if she was talking to herself instead of Jace anymore.

[Jace]

Jace let out a sigh, he had seen many Jedi young and old go through this type of dilemma. They worried about too much, tried to take on the burden of the galaxy by themselves. It was a noble ideal but it shouldn't be lingered on.

"Rae, the Force has a purpose for everyone in this galaxy whether they know it or not. The Force is the all encompassing life force in this galaxy. If no one listened, do you think you would be having so many fellow Jedi? While many do not approve of our ways, we still hold great respect throughout the galaxy.

The galaxy isn't split up into Jedi and the dark side. There are many people who endeavor to combat the dark side without being a Jedi. We are not the only protectors of humanity, there are millions even billions of them.

As for those who despise our ways, we cannot hold that against them. Remember that everything always has more than one perspective. All we can do for them, is continue to do what we do and hope that they eventually understand.

You must take your minds off such things Rae, and trust in the Force. If you keep worrying about everything wrong in the galaxy, you will soon begin to despair...and we both know where that leads"

He encouraged Jedi to question their surroundings and the nature of the Universe and Force. He had seen many Jedi constantly question why there is so much suffering in the galaxy, and there is no solid answer. One thing he was sure of though, brooding on such things will only cause you pain in the end.

[RaeLynn]

Nodding her head again, RaeLynn nearly glared at the small pieces of hair falling in her face. As if she didn't have enough to worry about. She hardly thought at all for once as she pulled her hair back into a high ponytail, the hairs captured in the small band. Her mind wandered back to the 'easy' path as she felt herself say the next few words.

"I feel as if I'm doing nothing here. On Felucia, I was so much more helpful," she said, shaking her head at herself as she spun around again to face Jace. "Why do I feel as if I've made a mistake even though it was not I who decided, but my former master? But then... If I didn't have a purpose here, then why would I be here at all?"

Her head fell back as she let out another groan. Looking back at Jace, a somewhat confused half smile spread to her lips. "I know that my babbling makes no sense, Master. It seems so foreign hearing the words rather than thinking them, but... I don't know what to do anymore. I sit around by myself all day, thinking and meditating, only to come to the same question. What am I doing here? It feels as if I shouldn't be here... Like I'm intruding on some secret that would only confuse me and make me feel like an outsider. But the question is, if I do not feel as if I belong here, then where is it that I am supposed to go?"

The question, no matter how many times it had been asked, never got an answer. The discussion in her head always ended at that one question mark. Elsewhere was a place she was certainly unsure of.

[Jace]

Jace passed a hand along his gruff beard and then crossed his arms as he spoke.

"There is action and then there is inaction. There must always be a balance Rae, whether it be of light and Dark or sweet and spice. Many Jedi feel the need to constantly be in motion, for fear of lack of consequence. There is nothing wrong with sitting back, reflecting, being motionless. It its the way of the Force.

Darkness is coming Rae, and the Jedi must be prepared. Soon we will all be taking on dangerous tasks for the preservation of light. What you feel now, it is the calm before the storm...the deep breath before the plunge.

In remaining in the temple and training or reflecting, you will be helping others. Many Jedi seem to be milling around, but please do not see it as uselessness. If you die, how will you help the thousands that will need your help later? do not be so hasty young one. There will be more than enough to do in the near future."

He did not tell Rae, but the council was going to be assigning missions very soon. They needed to start gathering more information and getting Jedi out into the galaxy. Conflict was coming, Jace had sensed it long ago. There was still time though, and he planned to make the best use of it.

[RaeLynn]

She sighed again, nodding because she knew he was right. Jace, through the short amount of time she had heard of and known him, had always been that wise older brother like figure. He knew what do do in most situations within a moment of thought.

"I'm sorry, Master," she mumbled, shaking her head. "Sometimes I feel as if I've taken the wrong path. Was I meant to be a guardian? I do more thinking then fighting most of the time and I seem far more in touch with my Force side then in the lightsaber techniques. Or was I even meant to be a Jedi? What if..."

RaeLynn stopped herself, a wry smile coming to her lips. "What ifs are nothing but a waste of space, breath, and life. They fix nothing. Leave them in their tomb... My old master used to repeat that over and over if I even dared mutter the words."

Nodding her head to herself, she looked up into Jace's eyes before her normal smile came to her face. "I'm meant to be here," she stated confidantly. Rae shook her head, laughing a little as she sat again. "I get myself so worked up over little questions that always leads back to the fact that I am here. I'm meant to be here. The Force had guided me so far, so I cannot doubt in its path."

Thinking over what had just happened, she looked up again. "You know, you have a way of only pushing people instead of telling them the answers," she said, smiling up at him again.

[Jace]

"Why should I tell you an answer you already know?" He said with a playful smile on his face.

"As for being a Guardian and things of that nature. Those are just titles, nothing more nothing less. Do not give them much thought. For instance, I have the title of Battlemaster but you don't see me running around swinging my lightsaber all the time.

like you already said, trust in the Force Rae. I do not believe in coincidences, whatever has occurred is because of the will of the Force. That is why we train, so we can better understand the will of the Force.

Is there anything else on your mind which is bothering you?"

Some Masters found it troublesome to constantly have to answer questions. Jace would not deny the fact that he used to think much of the same way. His recent experiences had told him that imparting knowledge on others was one of the most rewarding feelings. Jace had lately taken to holding classes aside from his usual lightsaber instructions.

[RaeLynn]

Rae rolled her eyes a little at his 'question', nodding her head a little. To the second, she nodded again. She had to agree there. The Force was like a being itself with a will and a way. Its will was the way. It had been like that as long as time could record. Being one with the Force was making sure that its bidding was completed.

Looking down at her feet, RaeLynn thought for a moment. Something bothering her? Well, there was something that had bothered her since the very first days she had stepped foot onto Coruscant. Her brows furrowed as she thought of her early years and of the person who raised her. Of course she had always wondered what had happened to the woman who had been as a mother and mentor to her for much of her life. It bothered her to no end that she could not go back and make sure everything was as it was, both in order and appearance.

She looked up, nodding her head ever so slightly. "It has never stopped bothering me. I hardly know what I should do about it, but I... I shouldn't be dwelling in the past when my life is here, in the present."

[Jace]

Jace could sense her hesitancy, which meant that it was possibly something she felt conflicted with the Jedi ways. The specific mention of not dwelling on the past reinforced his assumption.

"Something or someone in your past that you are worried about?parents?siblings? old friends? maybe your mentor?"

It was hard to just forget about the past and those in it. The Order did not ask that you forget but remove all attachments. This was quite possibly one of the hardest ideals to achieve in the galaxy. For the fear of loss was a path to the darkside and hence why Jedi should have no attachments.

Many had left their families behind or had seen comrades fall. It was hard to not let that affect you, but it was the way of the Jedi. As long as you are willing to accept you are still attached to something, then it is better then denying it in totality. Jace himself had lost his surrogate father and mentor at the same time. Jace paid a heavy price for his attachment and it was a lesson which serves him to this day.

[RaeLynn]

As she nodded her head again, she let out an aggrivated sigh. It bothered her that she was so weak and prone to mortality when going through life, especially when she was trying to giver herself to others in service. It she could not get past such a bump, how was she to move on.

"It was not a parent, for I never met my mother or father. I had no siblings or friends really, but..."

Pausing, RaeLynn shook her head and looked up to the sky, almost as if she was searching for the planet for which she worried... and longed for. She missed the vegitation and fungal forms and creatures of Felucia. Closing her eyes, she tilted her head down again.

"I miss her. I miss her more then I thought I would on the day I left," she murmured, her eyes opening again. No one really knew of her past beyond coming to the Jedi Temple and being assigned to the former Jedi Knight Unis Aroona. Only a select few knew of the life she had once led under the skies of Felucia.

Snapping herself out of her trance, she looked back up at Jace. "She might as well have been my mother or sister or best friend because she was all I had," she said, not naming the woman that had sheltered her. It was almost as if she was frightened that saying her name would only amplify the pain or worry she felt.

"I fear for her, Master, for she was not as young as she had been for the earlier years of her life. She was... She was aging. The planet was tearing her down piece by piece and I fear that..."

Her eyes had watered some as she had spoken and only as she turned away did the water spill over.

"I fear that she is lost."

[Jace]

Jace just nodded slowly, for this happened all too often. Many Jedi were orphans, or had lost their family and ended up at the Temple. Then they were taken in by a Master, and that person became the closest thing that they had ever known as family. Jace himself never met his real parents, and then his Master fell. Suffice to say, it was not an easy time for him. He had strayed on the fringes of the Dark Side, but avoided it by immersing himself in tasks.

Jace took a step forward and placed a reassuring hand on Rae's shoulder. There was no Force power that could help him deal with situations like this, only experience.

"It is all right to worry about her, for it is only natural. Yet you must not fear for her. Fear of loss is a path to the darkside...I know I keep repeating myself but you must always keep that in mind.

My former master was the only friend and parent I had. I never knew my real parents, just as you didn't. At the age of 21, he was killed by a Dark Jedi, right before my eyes. In anger and hate, I killed an already defeated opponent. Attachment and the fear of loss can lead to terrible things, your must avoid it Rae.

The life of a Jedi is not easy...."

He left that sentence hanging there, the truth rang clear in it. No Jedi became one because it was an easy path. Some may have joined just for glory but still hard work was needed. The Life of a Jedi was not easy...

[RaeLynn]

RaeLynn choked back a small sob, placing her hand on top of his a moment and giving it a small squeeze. Appreciation. Her heart swelled a minute as she let her hand move to her face, covering her mouth to muffle her harsh breathing. The tears rolled silently down her face as it turned toward the sky again, gazing into the distance and hoping that there was something she could do. She felt so... helpless.

The only time she remembered feeling like such a lost child was when she was one, the large Fungal Forest of Felucia confusing her and leaving her on the ground in a crumpled and crying heap. It was a day and a half before they were able to find her. She had made sure that she would never go back into the dense mess of mushroom-trees without her master until she knew the place like the back of her hand. It soon became one of her favorite areas of the planet.

She looked over at Jace, nodding her head just slightly, taking in what he had to say. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate... The whole thing had her worried that she would become something that she did not wish. It was not in her agenda to go against all that she had ever known. She just wished that she could go back to the days when she felt at peace with everything around her. At his story of what had happened to him, she glanced up in shock.

"I did not know, Master Jace... I'm- I'm so sorry," she whispered, her heart filling with a sadness that she had known when her second master was killed by a Dark Jedi. She had been discouraged by such a feeling and it took her a few days to gain the faith in the Force to face the world again. Her head dropped a little, a small sigh coming from her unevenly.

"I'm sorry," she murmured, her voice holding a slightly tone. It wasn't the same apology, but one for her ramblings. Rae always seemed so out of place in the world when it came to speaking.

[Jace]

Jace knew that if he were any other person, he could most likely console her better. Aside from the Jedi teachings, his ability to express compassion had been severely lacking. He had felt it, but he never had all that much chance to express it.

"There is no need to apologize Rae, now enough tears...you are a Jedi..take solace in that fact."

There wasn't much Jace could say, but he wasn't sure if that was just because of his nature. Suffice to say, he felt that he had atleast done a decent job.

[RaeLynn]

The tears themselves, almost as if obeying them, stopped coming out. Trails were left behind on her face, the salty path just a little bit hard against her skin. Her eyes shifted around her as she thought everything through once again. It had helped to talk to him, but something she had once heard was bothering her. It was an old saying that had forever been with her and now it was coming back to screw with her mind.

"Master... What would you say to this? It's a saying I heard very long ago and it... It holds truth, but I feel as if it somewhat goes against what you just said about not fearing for her," she said, biting her lip a little as her eyebrows furrowed together and her eyes narrowed at the ground. Her face lifted again as she looked at him, continuing what she was saying.

"'Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage without fear.' It was once said to me by a Felucian chief while I-" She cut herself off, narrowing her eyes once more as she glanced away. "Well, it doesn't matter where I heard it. It seems as if it contradicts what you said."