Post by Jenno on May 18, 2009 18:18:21 GMT -5
I'm currently in the process of writing a character for another forum, one of our affiliate, Beyond The Old Republic.
I find the plot of the site rather interesting and also think that it can do well.
Now, in terms of the character, since I had a shot at making the 'big bad' on SWU I thought I'd have a crack at the other end of the spectrum. So, with Arc's (the admin's) approval I started to develop my character. I've got quite a lot in mind for him although a lot of it isn't defined as of yet, I just intend for this bio to be my longest and hopefully best so far
So far I've written up to the age of five and have almost 2,500 words. Comments are more than welcome, remember that the stats and such are also a work in progress as they wont be defined until I've writen his history. So, here you are.
_________________________________________________________
Full Name: Vorr Kaeel (“Vor Kay-eel”)
Race: Nautolan
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Height: 6’0
Weight: 204 lbs
Bithplace: Glee Anselm
Rank: Jedi Grand Master / High Council Member / Jedi Master
Lightsaber: Single Blade
Color: Silver
Lightsaber Skills and Forms:
Shii-Cho: 5
Makashi: 3
Soresu: 5
Ataru: 1
Shien / Djem So: 5
Niman: 1
Jar'Kai: 0
Double-bladed Lightsaber Combat: 0
Mounted Lightsaber Combat: 3
Force Sensitive Abilities and Practices:
Force Manipulation: 9
Force Senses: 7
Protection: 8
Healing: 6
Force Powers - Destruction: 3
Attributes:
Physical Strength: 7
Intelligence: 9
Speed: 6
Leadership: 7
Unarmed Combat: 3
Force Attunement: +7
Appearance:
Personality:
History:
Vorr Kaeel was born only a few months before the fifty-year war began, so his life was consumed and plagued with battle, blood and loss. He was born and spent his first few years upon the Nautolan native world of Glee Anselm under the care and guidance of his mother and father, Jaal and Nomma Kaeel. He was the first and only child they had together. The family was part of colony called Aritsar, which resided on a relatively well sized landmass. It had been almost a thousand years since it had been taken from the Anselmi, and they had never once tried to take it back.
Vorr’s parents were simple Nautolans. His father, Jaal, was one of the many who hunted for wild fish and meat every day, in order to make sure everyone had food to eat, he was a well respected members of the colony due to his kindness and ability when it came to the catch. Nomma had most of her time taken up with looking after Vorr and so there was very little she could do in terms of contributing to the community. However, as Vorr grew up and turned two, she thought it was time to take a more active role. She opened up a small nursery to look after a lot of the children, so that mothers in a similar position to herself, who had beneficial talents, would not be restricted to the house all day every day. This nursery was open to all children aged one to five, at which time they should be entering some form of education or work system.
With a few other female Nautolan to help her, Nomma’s nursery became a great success and many children were cared for there. Vorr was also given the opportunity to meet with a wide number of other children around his age and make friends, which he did quite successfully. Vorr was a sweet child who craved social interaction even at the age of two and so he went out of his way to be friendly towards everyone who came to his mother’s nursery.
Even with trying to know and get along with everyone there was still a small inner group of friends whom he came to spend most of his time with. There were five others in total, Lon was shy but sensitive, Eynto was quite boisterous and often got into trouble because of it, Yuraii was, in a similar fashion to Vorr, generally friendly towards everyone, Draef was quite a righteous child, always trying to prevent a fight or any bullying that took place and Shyyn was the only female of their little group, she had quite a fiery attitude and was not one to get on the wrong side of, a fact which people came to learn after a few years of being together.
They spent most days together when they were at the nursery for four years. Like most group of friends they had their occasional bratty falling outs but they were always resolved in the end and they became quite a tight friendship group.
However, this changed when the war reached their world. There was no direct assault to begin with, Glee Anselm was on the Mid Rim and up until now the Dark Jedi and their army had only been fighting on the Outer Rim. But a few recent victories gave them enough courage to attempt a few assaults upon the Mid Rim, to show the Republic that they were getting stronger. Given the world’s primary exports of foodstuffs, medicine and water, Glee Anselm had quite a lot to offer the Sith Empire and the worlds they controlled on the Outer Rim.
Their plans required time, patients and manipulation. In order to amass a force large enough to break through to the Mid Rim the Sith Empire required a great deal of time and so set about adding to their arsenal by recruiting some of the planet’s natives, the Anselmi. Offering them dominance of the planet if there assault was a success, the Empire managed to persuade many of the large Anselmi groups to band together and unite for one cause. Yet they achieved this unison before the Dark Jedi could move to assist them.
And so, with no real military backing the Nautolans only felt the effects of these through a few minor raids across some of the small landmasses. Many of the larger colonies such as Aritsar were unaffected by these raids and in truth knew very little about them. However, the Anselmi, with a fair number of victories under their belt, soon became bolder in their attacks.
Aritsar was one of the first larger landmass colonies to be attacked, no longer were the Anselmi content with taking over the smaller sections of Glee Anselm, they were ready to declare all out war with the Nautolans. With the element of surprise, superior numbers and superior planning, the Anselmi moved through Aritsar like a bloody swath. They shot, stabbed and burned everything and everyone in their way. In truth the aim of the Anselmi’s attacks was not to gain land, but to achieve racial dominance over the Nautolans, like they had thousands of years ago.
To those who lived in the colony of Aritsar the day of the attack started the same as any other, early in the morning men and women set about working and children came to Nomma’s nursery the same as they did every other day. Jaal had headed out with a party in order to catch some fresh fish before the sun had even come up.
The Anselmi waited until the sun was at it’s highest until they attacked, descending upon the men, women and children throughout the colony. Having only recently returned from collecting the morning catch, Jaal was still quite worn out and at a disadvantage when the Anselmi burst down the door to the nursery building. Jaal did his best to protect the children and women who were trying to find a safe place to hide. However, even with his successful take down of a few of the Anselmi in a wild and desperate attack, he was gutted right in front of the entire nursery.
Wasting no time, the Anselmi set upon the women and children, instantly killing those they could find. Lon was discovered by a particularly nasty Anselmi as he cowered in fear in a corner of the nursery. Vorr and the rest of the gang had been trying to get out through the back of the nursery but, after discovering Lon was no longer with them, they returned to bring him along. But when they returned they did so only to hear a shrill scream and find an Anselmi holding the child’s head, fully detached from it’s body and with the mouth still gaping silently mid-scream. In a fit of tears and rage, the five children jumped upon this now surprised Anselmi and started pounding against their friend’s murder.
Had help not arrived at that time then the children would have most likely been killed, but it seemed as though luck still protected at least the five of the six in their group who still remained. A band of Nautolan males had come to protect the children, they showed up whilst the Anselmi were distracted by the attack of the children on their comrade. Using this as a distraction the Nautolans quickly put an end to the Anselmi that were present and took the women, child and dead bodies to a secure area of the colony, one of the structures that was now fortified against attacks as best as it could be.
It was in this safe area that Vorr, along with his mother and friends mourned the loss of his father and Lon. In his eyes, neither deserved the hand fate dealt to them. He felt hate towards the Anselmi who were still killing innocent Nautolans throughout Aritsar. Even though he felt this anger, Vorr still did not wish death upon them all too readily, if anything his wish was for peace, for there to be no killing between the two races, for Lon and his father to be alive and laughing by his side. Instead he was flanked by tears and the distant sound of screams and blaster fire.
Vorr can’t remember how long he was stuck within that building as he passed in and out of consciousness quite frequently. In truth however, only a few hours passed before Vorr and most of the other children awoke, the smell of death and scorched flesh was much more prominent in the air now and the sound of blaster fire was much closer.
The arrival of the ship was not a hidden secret as it was quite a distinct and new sound for those who were currently caught up in the midst of the skirmish. Not too long after the ship was heard landing a few figures arrived in the fortified building. There were five of them in total, all Nautolans, which is why they had managed to make it inside the building without incident. Four of the Nautolans were armoured and part of the Nautolan’s military force. But the Nautolan male who headed up the group wore a very neat robe and one his hip rested a long cylindrical object that Vorr had only heard about in stories, it was a lightsaber, and it belonged to a Jedi.
But this was not any Jedi. Jedi Master Rynt’ovar (often referred to as Ryn Tovar) was Watchman for Glee Anselm and, upon rumours of an Anselmi attack and an urging through the Force, had travelled to Aritsar with a small unit provided by the local government in Pieralos to see if these whispers were true. Now he found himself in a ruined building with one of the few surviving groups, it seemed as though his suspicions had been true. But given their current numbers there was very little to be done in order to fight off the Anselmi, even with a Jedi Master.
During what seemed to be a siege-like situation for those inside the building, Master Rynt’ovar went about helping those he could, healing those that were injured. Eventually he came across Vorr and his four remaining friends, who had all been fairly quiet since they had woken. The Master was quite intrigued by the little group, the Force seemed to call out from them, after a few discrete tests it seemed as though there were two force-sensitives amongst the group. Both Draef and Vorr were at a level where the Council would no doubt accept them into the Order. During this time of war it was imperative that the Jedi secure recruits to make sure their Order would have a future. Master Rynt’ovar consulted Draef’s parents first, both of whom had made it safely to the building. After they had consulted with one another and with Draef, they decided they would allow the Jedi to take the child before the council. When Master Tovar spoke to Nomma however, the story was a little different. After the loss of her husband, Vorr was now the only thing she had left in her life. And so she denied the Jedi Master’s request. He respectfully agreed to her wishes and did not persist.
After holding out for so long the Nautolans new that there was no real hope of survival without support from the capital. But with communications blocked there was no way to send a request. And so Master Tovar made a proposition, he would take all the women and children he could on his ship, fly them to Pieralos and request reinforcements be sent to Aritsar. After holding a small vote it was decided that they would follow the Jedi Watchman’s plan.
Vorr, his friends, and his mother all followed Master Tovar to his ship. They had to be as stealthy as they possibly could and try to avoid any Anselmi along the way. However, not everything went according to plan. Whilst they were on the way to the ship, a building that they were passing through collapsed, killing some and leaving the survivors in two groups, but completely cut off from one another. Vorr found himself with Master Tovar, his friends and some other children and women, but he could not see his mother. The rapid sound of gunfire and deathly cries from the other side of the now collapsed building left little hope in Vorr’s heart as another part of him died. He was pulled away from the building by his friends, who supported him all the way to the ship.
They made the rest of the journey without incident and the survivors climbed on board. The ship was incredibly small and in truth, it was doubtful that everyone would have been able to fit in had they all made it. Master Tovar quickly pulled the ship up in their attempt to escape. However, the Anselmi were not too eager to let this ship and its passengers escape. From amongst the numerous shots that were fired, one of the larger energy blasts was strong enough to rock the ship which was still in the process of taking off, only thirty meters in the air. This sudden jerk caught those on board unprepared, Draef was unlucky enough to lose his footing and he tumbled helplessly down the still-closing loading ramp, a terrible fall awaiting him.
They made it out alive, four of them survived. Many would have considered them lucky, but they didn’t feel it. The ride to Pieralos was a painful one for all of the survivors, not just the four children. When they reached the capital there was little left of the child who had once laughed and joked with his friends in that peaceful nursery, death and loss had ravaged what should have been his childhood years.
Master Tovar met with Vorr multiple times after that. He provided guidance to the child’s thoughts, offered suggestions and wisdom. He slowly helped Vorr to regain a part of himself which had died, hope. With all that had happened, Vorr could not simply live upon Glee Anselm for the rest of his life, it would kill him. And so he asked Master Tovar if he could be put before the Council and tested for entry into the Jedi Order, the Jedi Master agreed to his request.
With sorrowful and mournful farewells, Vorr bid goodbye to Eynto, Yuraii and Shyyn as well as giving his respects to those who had fallen in the massacre at Aritsar. Now prepared, he went with Master Tovar to Coruscant to be tested, after rigorous tests he was accepted into the Order as a Jedi youngling, with his training to begin almost immediately.
I find the plot of the site rather interesting and also think that it can do well.
Now, in terms of the character, since I had a shot at making the 'big bad' on SWU I thought I'd have a crack at the other end of the spectrum. So, with Arc's (the admin's) approval I started to develop my character. I've got quite a lot in mind for him although a lot of it isn't defined as of yet, I just intend for this bio to be my longest and hopefully best so far
So far I've written up to the age of five and have almost 2,500 words. Comments are more than welcome, remember that the stats and such are also a work in progress as they wont be defined until I've writen his history. So, here you are.
_________________________________________________________
There is no emotion, there is peace.
Vorr Kaeel
Full Name: Vorr Kaeel (“Vor Kay-eel”)
Race: Nautolan
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Height: 6’0
Weight: 204 lbs
Bithplace: Glee Anselm
Rank: Jedi Grand Master / High Council Member / Jedi Master
Lightsaber: Single Blade
Color: Silver
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
Lightsaber Skills and Forms:
Shii-Cho: 5
Makashi: 3
Soresu: 5
Ataru: 1
Shien / Djem So: 5
Niman: 1
Jar'Kai: 0
Double-bladed Lightsaber Combat: 0
Mounted Lightsaber Combat: 3
There is no passion, there is serenity.
[/i][/left] Force Sensitive Abilities and Practices:
Force Manipulation: 9
Force Senses: 7
Protection: 8
Healing: 6
Force Powers - Destruction: 3
There is no chaos, there is harmony.
[/i][/right]Attributes:
Physical Strength: 7
Intelligence: 9
Speed: 6
Leadership: 7
Unarmed Combat: 3
There is no chaos, there is harmony.
Force Attunement: +7
Appearance:
Personality:
History:
- Innocence –
“The innocent and the beautiful have no enemy but time”
~William Butler Yates
[/i][/center]“The innocent and the beautiful have no enemy but time”
~William Butler Yates
Vorr Kaeel was born only a few months before the fifty-year war began, so his life was consumed and plagued with battle, blood and loss. He was born and spent his first few years upon the Nautolan native world of Glee Anselm under the care and guidance of his mother and father, Jaal and Nomma Kaeel. He was the first and only child they had together. The family was part of colony called Aritsar, which resided on a relatively well sized landmass. It had been almost a thousand years since it had been taken from the Anselmi, and they had never once tried to take it back.
Vorr’s parents were simple Nautolans. His father, Jaal, was one of the many who hunted for wild fish and meat every day, in order to make sure everyone had food to eat, he was a well respected members of the colony due to his kindness and ability when it came to the catch. Nomma had most of her time taken up with looking after Vorr and so there was very little she could do in terms of contributing to the community. However, as Vorr grew up and turned two, she thought it was time to take a more active role. She opened up a small nursery to look after a lot of the children, so that mothers in a similar position to herself, who had beneficial talents, would not be restricted to the house all day every day. This nursery was open to all children aged one to five, at which time they should be entering some form of education or work system.
With a few other female Nautolan to help her, Nomma’s nursery became a great success and many children were cared for there. Vorr was also given the opportunity to meet with a wide number of other children around his age and make friends, which he did quite successfully. Vorr was a sweet child who craved social interaction even at the age of two and so he went out of his way to be friendly towards everyone who came to his mother’s nursery.
Even with trying to know and get along with everyone there was still a small inner group of friends whom he came to spend most of his time with. There were five others in total, Lon was shy but sensitive, Eynto was quite boisterous and often got into trouble because of it, Yuraii was, in a similar fashion to Vorr, generally friendly towards everyone, Draef was quite a righteous child, always trying to prevent a fight or any bullying that took place and Shyyn was the only female of their little group, she had quite a fiery attitude and was not one to get on the wrong side of, a fact which people came to learn after a few years of being together.
They spent most days together when they were at the nursery for four years. Like most group of friends they had their occasional bratty falling outs but they were always resolved in the end and they became quite a tight friendship group.
However, this changed when the war reached their world. There was no direct assault to begin with, Glee Anselm was on the Mid Rim and up until now the Dark Jedi and their army had only been fighting on the Outer Rim. But a few recent victories gave them enough courage to attempt a few assaults upon the Mid Rim, to show the Republic that they were getting stronger. Given the world’s primary exports of foodstuffs, medicine and water, Glee Anselm had quite a lot to offer the Sith Empire and the worlds they controlled on the Outer Rim.
Their plans required time, patients and manipulation. In order to amass a force large enough to break through to the Mid Rim the Sith Empire required a great deal of time and so set about adding to their arsenal by recruiting some of the planet’s natives, the Anselmi. Offering them dominance of the planet if there assault was a success, the Empire managed to persuade many of the large Anselmi groups to band together and unite for one cause. Yet they achieved this unison before the Dark Jedi could move to assist them.
And so, with no real military backing the Nautolans only felt the effects of these through a few minor raids across some of the small landmasses. Many of the larger colonies such as Aritsar were unaffected by these raids and in truth knew very little about them. However, the Anselmi, with a fair number of victories under their belt, soon became bolder in their attacks.
Aritsar was one of the first larger landmass colonies to be attacked, no longer were the Anselmi content with taking over the smaller sections of Glee Anselm, they were ready to declare all out war with the Nautolans. With the element of surprise, superior numbers and superior planning, the Anselmi moved through Aritsar like a bloody swath. They shot, stabbed and burned everything and everyone in their way. In truth the aim of the Anselmi’s attacks was not to gain land, but to achieve racial dominance over the Nautolans, like they had thousands of years ago.
To those who lived in the colony of Aritsar the day of the attack started the same as any other, early in the morning men and women set about working and children came to Nomma’s nursery the same as they did every other day. Jaal had headed out with a party in order to catch some fresh fish before the sun had even come up.
The Anselmi waited until the sun was at it’s highest until they attacked, descending upon the men, women and children throughout the colony. Having only recently returned from collecting the morning catch, Jaal was still quite worn out and at a disadvantage when the Anselmi burst down the door to the nursery building. Jaal did his best to protect the children and women who were trying to find a safe place to hide. However, even with his successful take down of a few of the Anselmi in a wild and desperate attack, he was gutted right in front of the entire nursery.
Wasting no time, the Anselmi set upon the women and children, instantly killing those they could find. Lon was discovered by a particularly nasty Anselmi as he cowered in fear in a corner of the nursery. Vorr and the rest of the gang had been trying to get out through the back of the nursery but, after discovering Lon was no longer with them, they returned to bring him along. But when they returned they did so only to hear a shrill scream and find an Anselmi holding the child’s head, fully detached from it’s body and with the mouth still gaping silently mid-scream. In a fit of tears and rage, the five children jumped upon this now surprised Anselmi and started pounding against their friend’s murder.
Had help not arrived at that time then the children would have most likely been killed, but it seemed as though luck still protected at least the five of the six in their group who still remained. A band of Nautolan males had come to protect the children, they showed up whilst the Anselmi were distracted by the attack of the children on their comrade. Using this as a distraction the Nautolans quickly put an end to the Anselmi that were present and took the women, child and dead bodies to a secure area of the colony, one of the structures that was now fortified against attacks as best as it could be.
It was in this safe area that Vorr, along with his mother and friends mourned the loss of his father and Lon. In his eyes, neither deserved the hand fate dealt to them. He felt hate towards the Anselmi who were still killing innocent Nautolans throughout Aritsar. Even though he felt this anger, Vorr still did not wish death upon them all too readily, if anything his wish was for peace, for there to be no killing between the two races, for Lon and his father to be alive and laughing by his side. Instead he was flanked by tears and the distant sound of screams and blaster fire.
Vorr can’t remember how long he was stuck within that building as he passed in and out of consciousness quite frequently. In truth however, only a few hours passed before Vorr and most of the other children awoke, the smell of death and scorched flesh was much more prominent in the air now and the sound of blaster fire was much closer.
The arrival of the ship was not a hidden secret as it was quite a distinct and new sound for those who were currently caught up in the midst of the skirmish. Not too long after the ship was heard landing a few figures arrived in the fortified building. There were five of them in total, all Nautolans, which is why they had managed to make it inside the building without incident. Four of the Nautolans were armoured and part of the Nautolan’s military force. But the Nautolan male who headed up the group wore a very neat robe and one his hip rested a long cylindrical object that Vorr had only heard about in stories, it was a lightsaber, and it belonged to a Jedi.
But this was not any Jedi. Jedi Master Rynt’ovar (often referred to as Ryn Tovar) was Watchman for Glee Anselm and, upon rumours of an Anselmi attack and an urging through the Force, had travelled to Aritsar with a small unit provided by the local government in Pieralos to see if these whispers were true. Now he found himself in a ruined building with one of the few surviving groups, it seemed as though his suspicions had been true. But given their current numbers there was very little to be done in order to fight off the Anselmi, even with a Jedi Master.
During what seemed to be a siege-like situation for those inside the building, Master Rynt’ovar went about helping those he could, healing those that were injured. Eventually he came across Vorr and his four remaining friends, who had all been fairly quiet since they had woken. The Master was quite intrigued by the little group, the Force seemed to call out from them, after a few discrete tests it seemed as though there were two force-sensitives amongst the group. Both Draef and Vorr were at a level where the Council would no doubt accept them into the Order. During this time of war it was imperative that the Jedi secure recruits to make sure their Order would have a future. Master Rynt’ovar consulted Draef’s parents first, both of whom had made it safely to the building. After they had consulted with one another and with Draef, they decided they would allow the Jedi to take the child before the council. When Master Tovar spoke to Nomma however, the story was a little different. After the loss of her husband, Vorr was now the only thing she had left in her life. And so she denied the Jedi Master’s request. He respectfully agreed to her wishes and did not persist.
After holding out for so long the Nautolans new that there was no real hope of survival without support from the capital. But with communications blocked there was no way to send a request. And so Master Tovar made a proposition, he would take all the women and children he could on his ship, fly them to Pieralos and request reinforcements be sent to Aritsar. After holding a small vote it was decided that they would follow the Jedi Watchman’s plan.
Vorr, his friends, and his mother all followed Master Tovar to his ship. They had to be as stealthy as they possibly could and try to avoid any Anselmi along the way. However, not everything went according to plan. Whilst they were on the way to the ship, a building that they were passing through collapsed, killing some and leaving the survivors in two groups, but completely cut off from one another. Vorr found himself with Master Tovar, his friends and some other children and women, but he could not see his mother. The rapid sound of gunfire and deathly cries from the other side of the now collapsed building left little hope in Vorr’s heart as another part of him died. He was pulled away from the building by his friends, who supported him all the way to the ship.
They made the rest of the journey without incident and the survivors climbed on board. The ship was incredibly small and in truth, it was doubtful that everyone would have been able to fit in had they all made it. Master Tovar quickly pulled the ship up in their attempt to escape. However, the Anselmi were not too eager to let this ship and its passengers escape. From amongst the numerous shots that were fired, one of the larger energy blasts was strong enough to rock the ship which was still in the process of taking off, only thirty meters in the air. This sudden jerk caught those on board unprepared, Draef was unlucky enough to lose his footing and he tumbled helplessly down the still-closing loading ramp, a terrible fall awaiting him.
They made it out alive, four of them survived. Many would have considered them lucky, but they didn’t feel it. The ride to Pieralos was a painful one for all of the survivors, not just the four children. When they reached the capital there was little left of the child who had once laughed and joked with his friends in that peaceful nursery, death and loss had ravaged what should have been his childhood years.
Master Tovar met with Vorr multiple times after that. He provided guidance to the child’s thoughts, offered suggestions and wisdom. He slowly helped Vorr to regain a part of himself which had died, hope. With all that had happened, Vorr could not simply live upon Glee Anselm for the rest of his life, it would kill him. And so he asked Master Tovar if he could be put before the Council and tested for entry into the Jedi Order, the Jedi Master agreed to his request.
With sorrowful and mournful farewells, Vorr bid goodbye to Eynto, Yuraii and Shyyn as well as giving his respects to those who had fallen in the massacre at Aritsar. Now prepared, he went with Master Tovar to Coruscant to be tested, after rigorous tests he was accepted into the Order as a Jedi youngling, with his training to begin almost immediately.
- Student Of The Force –
“You cannot teach a man anything. You can only help him discover it within himself”
~Galileo Galilei
[/i][/center]“You cannot teach a man anything. You can only help him discover it within himself”
~Galileo Galilei
~To Be Continued
There is no death, there is the Force.
[/right][/i]
